I stretched breathing in the colder air. It was a nice december day, probably one of the last, however I still clung my track jacket close around my body as I worked on my Adv. Chem. homework. I sat on a bench out by the coy pond with my closest friends Ned Dunckel and Samantha Bash on the bench in front of me. A soft bell sound interrupted our silence.
“Addaline’s,” Samantha said without looking up from her theatre textbook.
I take my phone out of my bag only to stare into a similar face as mine. The content smile on my face dropped. I answer the phone with shaking hands. “H...Hello… Oh hello, Kayley…” Ned pretends to gag and I try to hide a laugh moving my hand down to the locket hanging from my neck. “Hm? Oh really, he wants to see me? No, I believe you.” Samatha gives a yeah right look and I fail to hide a laugh once again. “Two weeks? Over Christmas? Yes I’m free. Can I bring a friend or two? Great! See you then I guess.” I hung up my shaking hands finally starting to calm down.
“So how's the double doing?” Samantha asked.
I examined the locket around my neck staring at its vine like curves and the intertwined hearts in the middle. “She’s fine but what would you to say a trip to England over Christmas?”
“What?!” Ned choked on his water trying to find his breath. The loud noise making me jump dropping the locket from my hand “England? You mean high and royal tea and crumpets with the queen? That England?”
“Don’t be ridiculous Ned. The tea would be with her high and mighty family not the queen.” Samantha stated in an obvious tone.
“Not to mention any other high class citizens my father invites.” I add.
“Well I guess I can’t let you make a fool of yourself alone.” Samantha reasoned.
“Well if she’s in I am, I mean someone has to watch you two.” Ned smiled.
“Well it's decided, our plane will leave next Saturday morning.” I stated.

~

I pull my tan sweater tighter around my body as the cold England air swallows me whole in an instant. Ned comes over and gives me my jacket that I so foolishly left in the back of the family car.
The old driver gave me a yellowing smile, “Welcome home Miss. Addaline.” He said before speeding off to park the car.
“Miss. Addaline Summers, so glad you to see you have returned after all these years, the house has been strangely quiet without you and Kayley’s constant bickering. If your friends would please follow me to their rooms your father would like a word with you, I do hope you remember the route to his study.” An older looking man in a neat clean suit asked me.
“Yes, thank you Alexander. I’ll see you guys later.” I walked up to the manor house hesitantly opening  the door with shaking hands. The familiar smell of a burning wood fire in the large foyer brought with it both happy and painful memories from my childhood. I walked the route taken so many times in my youth, the trail up to him. I stopped in front of old oak doors inhaling deeply to get the smell of the ancient wood. This house hasn’t changed in twelve years and I knew that the man on the other side of this door hadn’t either. Bearing this in mind I hesitantly knocked.
“Come in, girl.” Came the stone cold voice of my father. I opened the door and stepped inside, immediately being surrounded by the smell of ink, high quality cigars, burning wood, and expensive cologne that filled my father’s study. That was all it took to send me spiraling back in time, I wasn’t a college student anymore I was a nine and a half year old girl who had just lost her mother. “What are you doing standing there sit down.”
“R...Right.” I shake my head to clear my mind and look to the intimidating figure standing from his desk and moving to one of the armchairs by the fire. His shaggy brown hair neatly combed, his black suit free of any wrinkle or imperfection, his cold judging ice blue eyes staring through his glasses landing on me as I occupy the seat beside his. “Hello father, I hope you’ve been well.” I greet sounding more like a well trained machine then his eldest child.
“Very well, thank you, I do hope that the presence of you and your friends in this manor will not disturb the silence I have come to hold so dear.” He pushed his glasses up and looked at me with a stern glare. My hand went for the locket.
“No, sir. It will be like we aren’t even here.” I softly answered trying to prove a point.
“Excellent, I am assuming you remember the location of your old room?” He questioned.
“Yes, sir.”
He got up linking his arms behind his back, “Well then, off you go. Welcome home, Addaline, and I would prefer for the next few days if you and your friends would refrain from eating your meals in the dining hall.”
I nodded respectfully, “Until then, father.”
Exiting from his office I let go of the breath I had been holding and started to my room. Opening the familiar cherry wood door I stepped into my old room, dark maroon walls lined with a golden trim, black curtains blocking out the sun, and a warm welcoming fire. A smile filled my face as I ran and jumped onto the bed, enjoying the scent of the fresh sheets.
“Glad you like it.” Ned laughed at me from the frame of my door. I laughed and sat up motioning for my two friends to join me.
“So how was your meeting with your dad?” Samantha asked me, concerned as she sat to my right.
I sighed, leaning my head back against the wall. “Well, it was exactly how I expected it to be, after all I highly doubt that letting me come home was my father's idea. We aren’t even allowed to join them for any meals. Let’s face it, the only reason any of us are here is Kayley.” Samantha nodded while Ned gave me a sad look.
“It’s not right Addy, you're his eldest daughter, doesn't that mean anything in this house?” Ned asked, his voice raising slightly.
“Shh! Do you want him to come down here?” Samantha asked, hitting Ned’s shoulder with a slight force.
“Both of you stop it, please. I brought you with me for support not to turn on each other last minute.” I hissed listening for the loud angered footsteps to come down the hall. When the house was quiet I sighed in relief giving a close call look to the other two in the room.

~

I wrapped myself in my thick winter coat as I started my daily routine sprinting down the snowy trail to my mother’s old garden. The soft white flurys covered my head like a halo bring a soft smile to my face. Once at the old black gate, I pushed open the rusty entrance that let out a loud hiss of resistance. “I guess no one's been here since mom.” I sighed sadly. After finding my old bench I sat down looking at the snowbells by my feet. I opened the gold locket and stared into the face of the photo. Long blond hair in a half ponytail, bright blue eyes working with her smile to express her joy, her clothes were slightly covered in mud, and she seemed to look at the camera man in a kind loving way. I closed my eyes and let the photo take me back to better days.
The warm sun beating down as mother watered the snow colored roses. “Mother, are the roses your favorite of your flowers in the garden?” A six year old me asked.
“Well, in the summer yes, but I think that my absolute favorite come in the winter.” She smiled wiping her hands off on her skirt. Her gold locket bouncing around her neck with each motion.
“How can they grow in the winter? It’s so cold, wouldn’t they die?” I asked with curious light blue eyes.
“Well, my dear I believe that that mystery is what makes the snowbells my favorite.” She looked at me with eyes similar to mine making the younger me smile. We stayed in the garden long past sun down and only when the moon was high in the sky did we return home, this is how I spent the better days of my childhood.
“Kayley, there you are, what are you doing in this old place?” Asked a male's voice in a thick british accent. I shake my head finally coming back into reality as I drop the locket held in my hand. A young man just a little younger then me stood before me. He was a good four or five feet taller than me, yet his hazel eyes held a kind of child like instinct and his long black hair was messy covering parts of his face. He looked strange yet oddly familiar.
“I’m sorry, but I’m not Kayley.” The boy’s eyes widened at my american accent. I stand up and look the boy in the eyes but, before I can explain anything he surprises me even more.
“Add….Addaline?” He tilted his head causing his hair to move with him as his face finally strikes a memory within my mind and recognition hits me.
“Isaac? Is that you?” I hold my breath as he smiles causing a smile to form on my face as well.
“Wow!” I exclaim as I hug him then pull away. “You’ve grown so much, the last time I saw you I still had a good couple inches on you, kid.” I teased my childhood friend.
“Kid? I’m only two years younger than you. My god, you and your sister man, you’ll never let me live that down.” He hid his face with his hair, turning away from me
“Well, it’s harder to tell now that's for sure.” We shared a laugh and I watched the last twelve years disappear once again leaving me in my childhood smiling at the seven year old boy playing in the roses. Only one thing was missing from my memories.
Isaac’s voice drops to a low whisper. “So, have you talked to Kayley yet?” With that one question the once happy atmosphere disappeared and is replaced with a cold that could freeze us in our steps.
“No, I’m not exactly sure what I would even say yet.” I answered truthfully.
“Why not start with how you feel, I can tell things are a little tense between you two.” He gave a slight smile.
“Yeah sure, that's a great idea.” I said sarcastically. “Hey Kayley, I have spent the majority of my life in your shadow, especially since mother died, father chose you and sent me away to america where I have done everything to prove that I am worth his affection while you stayed here and received the love and happiness that I have only ever dreamed of. But, that’s all water under the bridge, so do you want to call a truce?” I mockingly stuck my hand out to Isaac.
“You’ve been back home how long?”
“I don't know three or four days.” I sighed, putting my hand down.
“You're not even trying are you?” Isaac pouted. “You know she probably feels the same as you.”
“Yeah, sure she does.” I scoffed.
“No I mean it, even when Kayley first called you, it’s like you two are forced acquaintances, not sisters. I remember you two as kids, it’s not normal.” He sighed as my eyes tear up. In the distance I can hear the old church bell ringing.
“I...I have to go.” I rushed past him and out of the garden leaving Isaac behind.

~

I pulled and tugged at my knee length purple dress. For the first time since my arrival Saturday I had been invited to dinner with my family. For the first time in twelve years Kayley wasn't just a voice on the other end of a phone, and the thought of seeing that voice again filled me with a dreadful pain. I gripped my locket tightly looking for the comfort it always gave.
“Ok, let's get this family bonding over with, shall we?” Ned walked in, followed by his never failing cloud of energy and enthusiasm. Sam rolled her eyes getting up from her position on my bed.
“Fine by me. Addaline?” Sam and Ned stopped in their tracks as I turned to face them.
“This is really happening? I am about to walk into that room and face the girl that I have been compared to my whole life. What do I do?” My voice lowered to the point that the others had to strain to hear me.
“Addaline, you don't have to compare yourself to her. You never did.” Sam placed her hand on my shoulder and I turned on my heels to embrace her in a hug.
“Sammy’s right, Addaline, you have spent the best part of your life always competing to be the best. Maybe Kayley hasn’t.” Ned stated coming over to join in our embrace.
“What would I do without you two?” I wiped the tears from my face looking at my friends, who had sandwiched me between them. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves. “Ok, I'm ready.”
The three of us walked down the hall and stopped before the dinning room door. Already the smell of sweet glazes, fresh herbs, sliced meats, and freshly baked bread hit my nose. Ned looked at my hesitant form and stopped Sam from pushing the door open.
“You don't have to do this.” His voice had lost all it’s childish tone.
“Yes, I do.” I took a deep breath letting go of my locket. “Hold my hand?” I asked Ned holding out the hand that once held my locket.
“Always.” He smiled and nodded to Sam to open the door, there was no going back now. I walked hand in hand with Ned into the room. My father sat at the head of the table with Kayley to his right patting the seat between her and Isaac with a small smile. “You ready?” Ned asked bring me towards my sister as Samantha moved to the other side of the table to sit across from Isaac.
“As I’ll ever be.” My grip grew tighter as he pulled out my seat and I sat down.
“You’ll be fine, I believe in you.” Ned whispered pushing the seat in and moving to the seat across from me.
“Hello, Addaline.” Kayley greeted once Ned had taken his seat. My hand instinctively went to grab my locket but a foot brushed against mine making me stop. I looked up and my blue eyes meet with green ones as Ned discreetly shook his head no, my hand tensed but then lowered.
“Hello.” To my relief my voice came out clean and clear.
“How was your trip?” She asked staring a conversation.
“Oh, it was fine a little long, but that's to be expected.” She nodded her head and her blond curls moved with her.
“Good! I’m glad to hear it.” Kayley smiled and Isaac gave her a look to continue. “So… Um… The Christmas Eve thing is in a couple days and I was wondering if you…” Isaac nodded pushing her on. “If you might want to go dress shopping… with me. You know like we used to.” My eyes widened. “Oh, of course your friend is welcome to join us.” Kayley gave a mocking look to Isaac who looked as if someone had just hit him with a fish. “What do you say miss…”
“Samantha Bash. Thanks for the offer but I would rather go on my own, three's a crowd and all that.” Sam pushed her offer away with no effort.
“Well, ok then. How about you, Addaline?” Kayley asked me. I froze, if Sam wasn't going then I would be alone with her. I looked to my friends for an excuse not to go but, I knew that it was in vain.
“Sure, Kayley.” I answered timidly.
“Excellent, how about tomorrow?” Kayley’s voice had rose in volume and her smile was like a child’s on their birthday.
“Oh, um… yeah. I...I’m free tomorrow.” I smiled shyly.
“Wonderful, in fact why don’t you girls make a trip of it?” Our father suggested.
“Great, tomorrow it is then.” I said nervously.
I watched the two across the table secretly fist bump and a smile found it's way onto Isaac’s face, I now knew that this was their plan all along.

~

“Today was fun. It was almost like old times. Right Addy?” Kayley asked as I walked quietly down one of the many halls of the manor leading to your rooms, I stopped at the fork in the hallway.
“Almost, not quite.” I looked down at the locket, thinking of the woman inside.
“I really missed you.” Kayley said pulling me into a hug. I flinched for only a moment before returning the action.
“M..me too?” I mentally slap myself for making it a question.
“Why didn’t you come back?” Kayley asked pulling away.
“I never wanted to.” I could hear my voice shaking.
“Oh.” The word was soft but clear in the quiet halls.
“It’s not that I didn’t want to, my god it’s the only thing that I’ve wanted, I just…” I stopped myself before saying anything more.
“You just...” Kayley pushed me to finish.
“I...I… I have to go.” I started down the left hall but was stopped by Kayley grabbing my wrist.
“Please, tell me why! I just want to help.” Kayley’s voice was frantic and her eyes pleading as she begged me to stay.
“I never felt welcomed.” I spoke softly, shocking even myself. Kayley’s grip loosened and I pulled my arm from her hand continuing down the hall in a faster pace.
“You were,...” Kayley’s voice was soft, but her words followed me to my room as I shut the door and fell to my knees. I got up, putting the dress we picked out in the closet, my eyes still glossed over. I laid on the bed searching for comfort in my locket, but it seemed that even that was not enough any more. For the first time in twelve years the locket brought me no peace or joy.
“I guess something’s even you can’t fix, mom.” I sighed and for the first time in twelve years I took off my locket to place it on the table beside my bed. Kayley’s voice was still ringing through my head as I closed my eyes. “You were needed, I love you Addaline!” A small smile crossed my face, “maybe I love you too, Kayley.” With that thought in mind I finally fell into the first peaceful sleep that I’ve had in this house since my return.