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Hollow Corpses
if the dead die again, let me live through them.
let me breathe through the glass in their eyes and the stillness of their veins —
if they die again, let me love through them, through the rupture of my heart and the
quake of my grief. let my Heart be as mighty as them.
if my crime was to give, pour the red over my empty hands and beat and banish me so
lavishly until i am shiny enough to Take. to be taken. swallow me entirely so i can be
dissolved in your passerby heartstrings. let me lie in the soil of my soul, the wounds of
the worms that eat up my flesh until my bones feed the willow that sprouts from my memory.
there is more beauty in death than there ever was in your love.
i hear the wails over my trunk and grow eternal from the stillness of misery.
the truth is still but never silent. your breathing is my verdict,
the blood on my heel, the broken steel that pierces my lover’s back. my lover in my mask.
they say Achilles died twice so he could be born again. you will whisper into
the shadows and see the shape of my urn, ashes begging for you
to kill me a second time. to kill me again.
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I sometimes feel like my poems come to life fully formed. As though they reached me rather than I having made them.
This is what happened with Hollow Corpses. It is about want, depression, about love, and sometimes death. It is about the curious admiration we hold for death, and how it haunts us through life.
I would've been remiss if I hadn't added a bit of Greek mythology. The love story between Achilles and Patroclus (The Illiad, The Song of Achilles) was fundamental in the creation of this poem. Achilles dies twice: one when Patroclus, or his lover, does, and one when he himself is killed. We sometimes talk about an Achilles heel being what ends us, but Achilles had two - a living, breathing one, and his literal one. Through this I beg the question: do we die through those we love? And if so, can love bring us back to life?