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My Identity
I'm from Rockland where people simply stare at you for being black,
or maybe that’s just me overthinking.
I’m indecisive but I always know what I want.
Just last week I was in the store & I knew exactly what I wanted
but when I saw the multiple options I couldn’t decide which one I wanted to buy.
My brain was a difficult puzzle piece.
It took me a while to figure it out.
I’m from a loud family, the way they communicate with each other is similar to the sound of a pack of hunting bison.
Born in Nyack,
but somehow it doesn’t feel like my home.
I say things like “I'll never talk to them again”,
but like a boomerang I always go right back.
I don’t know why but I have attachment issues.
I get attached to guys who are like my dad,
It sounds weird & I don’t have ‘daddy issues’.
But I guess I just like boys who share similar personality traits with him.
I like going out but I can’t be out often and I most certainly can’t go out with just anybody.
I go to Nyack High School which they call a community,
but it oddly doesn’t feel like one.
I’m like a flying owl,
quietly observing my peers.
I won’t even think twice about opening my mouth to speak.
I’m constantly surrounded by people who think they know me,
which for some reason irritates my soul.
I'm from the Earth that’s obviously big
but it still seems so small.
7 billion people in the world
And I still feel lonely, like a bear in hibernation.
Maybe it’s cause I’m a kid,
but I don’t know if I belong.
But maybe I’m still evolving,
I guess time will tell.
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This poem is a edited version of a poem I wrote for an identity project as a sophomore. At the time I didn't know what my purpose was as a 15 year old girl. In this poem, i named places where I feel out of place as well as things that bother me and things I constantly face on a day to day basis. I still like this poem today because it shows the differences between sophomore and senior me but also the things that stayed the same since then. I see it through a new perspective now.