The weather darkens,
as does my heart.
The wind rises,
as do my thoughts.

Spring is here.
Love, hanging thick in the air.
I push it aside.
Slice through it with a knife.
Because I don't want love.

What if I just get hurt again,
like the times before.
He could crush me and my heart,
like the ones before.
What kind of idiot would take that risk?

I don't want to screw this up, again.
Too fast. Too slow.
I never get it right.

These awful thoughts rush into my head.
The seep into every memory and emotion.
I can't stop them.

Please Father, help me.
I'm crying out to you Father.
I don't know what to do.

Cleanse me Father.
Keep these devilish thoughts from my head.
Clear this wind. Settle this weather.

Please Father, help me.
Show me the path.
Because I don't know how...
I don't know how to love again.