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Daddy's Womb MAG
April 23, 2008
i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.
So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.
i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.
The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.
i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.
i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.
© Anonymous
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This article has 2184 comments.
It was great! I hope if you have time you'd check this out: TeenInk.com/poetry/sonnet/article/808811/The-Prickle-Bush/
So I read this a few times, and then I forgot about it for awhile. In that time I worked on a sketch of a dragon. The dragon was thin, and the bone showed through the scales, along with that, he was wingless. I drew a collar around his neck, and a chain that had been tied around a large stone; as it was connected to the core of the planet. The last I saw of the dragon was his eyes, staring up at the only sky he'd ever see. After about another month, I re read the poem. The last part of the poem struck me as something that could have happened to the dragon, and being the wimp I was, I started crying.
Cam_is_Away said...
on Jun. 16 2015 at 9:41 pm
I'm re-reading the last two lines, over and over again, trying to decided whether it is a good thing or a bad thing? I'm not sure... This is a fantastic poem that I read often - Great job! It holds so much in so few words! This is talent.
loveable-peaches said...
on Jun. 11 2015 at 12:58 pm
I wish I had a father :)
Check out my work here! TeenInk.com/poetry/free_verse/article/803145/A-Girl-Made-of-Glass/
PoeticAtheist SILVER said...
on May. 31 2015 at 10:24 am
would anybody be willing to look at one of my submissions It's my first spoken word piece and I would like as much feedback as possible. Thanks! TeenInk.com/poetry/free_verse/article/802213/A-prayer-to-my-mirror/
Roe-Daniels BRONZE said...
on May. 29 2015 at 8:46 am
I comment on this piece maybe a year ago and it is still number one in the most discussed. That's a true sign of a good poem. Looking forward to reading more of your work Carl H
Maddie0035 said...
on May. 28 2015 at 6:15 pm
Wow! This poem paints such a perfect picture of childhood!
UnknownSoul GOLD said...
on May. 17 2015 at 6:11 pm
I love this poem. Good job!
TheBestOfWriting BRONZE said...
on May. 15 2015 at 5:14 pm
love this poem!
super.ballerina SILVER said...
on May. 15 2015 at 9:04 am
There is a lot of symbolism in this piece. Really great work, Keep it up!
Please check out my poem at this site: TeenInk.com/poetry/free_verse/article/795039/Chasing-Dreams/
miiranda_18 BRONZE said...
on May. 13 2015 at 6:43 pm
Go check out mine! TeenInk.com/poetry/free_verse/article/.../The-Dirty-Man/
angelique said...
on May. 12 2015 at 3:17 pm
WOW. you really have skills you can right good poetry its easy to understand I just love it
baby-p said...
on Apr. 29 2015 at 12:22 pm
i have a native American side to me so when i feel things deeply n strong i get empathy chills idk how to explain it just that this poem was heart touching
MadisonHudson BRONZE said...
on Apr. 24 2015 at 2:44 pm
This was amazing. You have definetley got some skills.
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