Daddy's Womb | Teen Ink

Daddy's Womb MAG

April 23, 2008
By Anonymous

i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.



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This article has 2185 comments.


on Apr. 26 2010 at 9:15 pm
LostButNeverFound PLATINUM, Phoenix, Arizona
37 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right. Forget about the one's who don't. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it. Friends are like balloons: once you let them go, you can't get them back. So I'm gonna tie you to my heart so I never lose you.

i loved ur poem=]

on Apr. 26 2010 at 4:25 pm
MangoMoonlight BRONZE, Newton, Massachusetts
3 articles 1 photo 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Perfect is the enemy of good"

Yes, the poem is great, but I think the theme is what makes it so, not the slant rhyme and the stanzas.  And as for reminding you of Emily Dickinson, I'm thinking more of an E.E. Cummings "morbidly curious" feel.  But, I do see your point in posting a specific comment like that in a sea of "Carl, you're soo good" and "OMG you are fab".  Much more constructive.

on Apr. 26 2010 at 4:15 pm
MangoMoonlight BRONZE, Newton, Massachusetts
3 articles 1 photo 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Perfect is the enemy of good"

I love the basic idea of your poem and the rhyme is a perfect accent to your complex theme.  You made a tired, old "I wish my father would let me fly free" poem into a creative and fresh write.  Great work!

on Apr. 26 2010 at 11:58 am
Starrlyt PLATINUM, Willard, North Carolina
20 articles 0 photos 89 comments

Favorite Quote:
Shoot for the moon, even if you miss, you'll land among the stars -Les Brown

I believe the chain was a reference to how his father told him to 'grow up,' to say the least, but when he tried, his father held him back, figuratively, as though his father had attached a chain to his foot...make sense, or did i confuse you more? lol. I tend to do that...sorry.

leliza BRONZE said...
on Apr. 26 2010 at 11:21 am
leliza BRONZE, Wichita Falls, Texas
1 article 1 photo 17 comments
His father had has him on a chain.

on Apr. 25 2010 at 8:23 pm
AlleyBaldwin BRONZE, Brandon, Florida
4 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To the world your just one person, but to that one person, you are their world"

This is really good!!!! Keep writting cause your good

cortdb SILVER said...
on Apr. 24 2010 at 9:13 pm
cortdb SILVER, Tallmadge, Ohio
5 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If someone is always on your mind, they're probably supposed to be there."

okay that was amazinggggg!!!

but i dont get the whole chain thingy!!


on Apr. 22 2010 at 5:34 pm
BekkahsLoopy GOLD, San Jose, California
10 articles 4 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Keep looking forward; don&#039;t look back.&quot;<br /> &quot;To the world, you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.&quot;

anyone can relate to this. good job!

on Apr. 22 2010 at 2:57 pm
Thinker PLATINUM, Na, Connecticut
47 articles 0 photos 82 comments

Favorite Quote:
A wise word does not make the speaker wise.

Is your father really that constricting, sometime I feel the same way. My parents encourage me to do everything and yet when I do it they become mad.

kdiddy. BRONZE said...
on Apr. 21 2010 at 7:49 am
kdiddy. BRONZE, Hinton, West Virginia
1 article 0 photos 8 comments
nice, but i don't really understand it. could you explain, please?(:

Eilatan GOLD said...
on Apr. 19 2010 at 4:02 pm
Eilatan GOLD, Old Greenwich, Connecticut
11 articles 1 photo 307 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Nobody is normal. Everybody in the world is a weirdo freak. Except you, which makes you a weirdo freak.&quot;

that's incredibly inappropriate.

BeloveD SILVER said...
on Apr. 18 2010 at 4:17 pm
BeloveD SILVER, Gretna, Nebraska
5 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
If you love something, let it be. If it doesn&#039;t come back to you, it was never ment to be.

i liked it :) it was rather confussing but i still do like it

bmaaszlaxer said...
on Apr. 18 2010 at 3:17 pm
hahahahaha ily <3

JROCK10 said...
on Apr. 18 2010 at 2:40 pm
JROCK10,
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
&quot;every one knows im in over my head&quot;

That poem was beautiful, I loved it!!! Great job!!

on Apr. 16 2010 at 10:07 pm
Brooklynn SILVER, Lake Villa, Illinois
9 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;life is 10% of what happens to me and 90% of how i react to it&quot; John Maxwell

okay this poem rocked and those of you who are just randomly posting nasty stuff on here need to get a new life instead of making fun of people who actually utilize their time doing something they like to do. So you can take yourself and your nasty little comments and get out.

baxy222 BRONZE said...
on Apr. 16 2010 at 5:44 am
baxy222 BRONZE, Huyton, Other
4 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
If you don&#039;t have a good sense of humour, your better off dead- Roger Rabbit

nice it really shhows how some parents do intend to hold their children back, as unfortunate as it is. read my work plz

on Apr. 15 2010 at 12:34 am
Brooklea SILVER, Granite Falls, Minnesota
7 articles 7 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;let go of what kills you &amp; hold on to what keeps you breathing&quot;

i dont get it. can someone please explain this to me? its really good i just dont get it

Snoiday said...
on Apr. 14 2010 at 4:20 pm

I like the poem, and i get the idea of what you were going for, i think that the first part could be a lil better. u could deffinatly have a great poem if u improved the first half.  

Nice work though.


Dick said...
on Apr. 14 2010 at 12:28 pm
I love you scrappydoo

Flippenwhat said...
on Apr. 14 2010 at 12:24 pm
I'd Just like to say that i love this poem it fills my heart like i filled my friends face with my happy juice!!!