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Daddy's Womb MAG

April 23, 2008
By Anonymous

i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.

© Anonymous

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 2185 comments.

another_teenage_itiot PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 15 2010 at 11:16 am
another_teenage_itiot PLATINUM, Huston, Arkansas
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Why are we so angry<br /> why are we so sad<br /> we dont need to stare back<br /> at everything we had

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I like it! I also kinda relate to it.
LadyLuck GOLD said...
on Jan. 12 2010 at 4:22 pm
LadyLuck GOLD, Cumming, Georgia
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I love how you dance around the main idea, leaving readers wondering what it really means. When a poem makes you think deeply like that, that is a great poem. LOVE IT!
TaylorM SILVER said...
on Jan. 11 2010 at 8:44 pm
TaylorM SILVER, Hemet, California
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This is an excellant poem.
PAULY"the impact"B said...
on Jan. 11 2010 at 8:33 am
I really enjoyed your poem. I could tell that you are a very skilled writer and that you have a bright future ahead of you. Your words were deep and your thoughts were deeper. I literally almost cried.
heather_marie PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 8 2010 at 1:13 pm
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it was good inspireing poem but a little confused at the end.
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on Jan. 8 2010 at 8:42 am
I wish to make love to you when you are begging for it.
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on Jan. 7 2010 at 7:42 pm
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I thought it was very good. The first couple of sentences drew me in! Great job!
cookiemonstergurl333 said...
on Jan. 6 2010 at 7:06 pm
this poem is great! great rhythm throughout it! I wish i could write something that good! If this poem had rainbow sox, it would knock them right off! lol
L5L5 said...
on Jan. 6 2010 at 11:16 am
Very strong. I enjoyed reading it. Makes me realize how much i miss my childhood.

Every sentence waas poweful..except maybe 4 the as "i saw the birdie.."
MarinaNicole SILVER said...
on Jan. 5 2010 at 10:12 pm
MarinaNicole SILVER, Vancouver, Washington
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I like the rhythm that the rhyming forms-- really nice. But I'm a little confused on the concept of the poem. That's just me though, the poem was awesome. Loved it.
MatthewZ said...
on Jan. 4 2010 at 8:03 pm
nice! look at my poem too plz? http ://www.teenink .com /poetry/free_verse/article/156195/Airplanes/ rate and comment plz! thanks a million!
8thGemini GOLD said...
on Jan. 4 2010 at 6:30 pm
8thGemini GOLD, Corning, New York
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This is really good I mean great! The title was a little awkword though
Sr09 said...
on Jan. 4 2010 at 3:11 pm
Nice Poem ;) Very creative!
kiwi12 PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 3 2010 at 3:37 pm
kiwi12 PLATINUM, Austin, Texas
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It flows very well. I like it. It also reminds me a bit of Shel Silverstein.

swimming and flying.... all good stuff!
CUTIC0314 said...
on Dec. 30 2009 at 10:37 pm
i love this poem its so pretty.... whoever wrote this is a good poem writer
jake2011 DIAMOND said...
on Dec. 30 2009 at 5:43 pm
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I thought the whole poem was excellent. Keep writing.
averagejoe said...
on Dec. 30 2009 at 1:30 pm
i liked how you started flying, it was really imaginative.
forever casie said...
on Dec. 30 2009 at 12:15 pm
I think this is very powerful great job.
Raven_Lilith_Jace GOLD said...
on Dec. 29 2009 at 8:49 pm
Raven_Lilith_Jace GOLD, Boonville, Missouri
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i love it! i wish my stuff was HALF as good as this...
sesababi BRONZE said...
on Dec. 29 2009 at 3:04 pm
sesababi BRONZE, Crystal River, Florida
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Woooooow. this is absoultly amazing