Daddy's Womb | Teen Ink

Daddy's Womb MAG

April 23, 2008
By Anonymous

i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.



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This article has 2185 comments.


on Apr. 8 2011 at 8:19 pm
inspiredbytheworld BRONZE, Rockford, Michigan
3 articles 5 photos 30 comments
What kind of poetry is this? The good kind.

Angie123 GOLD said...
on Apr. 8 2011 at 8:17 pm
Angie123 GOLD, Madison, Alabama
16 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
" Keep on going and don't give up"

This is creative. I really like it :)

on Apr. 8 2011 at 7:54 am
HeArToNmYsLeEvE BRONZE, St. Helena Island, South Carolina
2 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
People have opened doors for me so who am I to slam it in your face<br /> -Me

despite what others may say this is a really good poem not confusing at all nice and to the point keep it up!

on Apr. 7 2011 at 12:53 pm
byebyebeautiful, North Olmsted, Ohio
0 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
so how long did i expect love to outweigh ignorance, by that look on your face i may have forced the scale to tip..... -AVENGED SEVENFOLD, ALMOST EASY

it was amazing! you are a gifted person, keep up the good work! <3

on Apr. 7 2011 at 12:40 pm
How is this a hot poem? What kind of poetry is this?

on Apr. 5 2011 at 8:13 pm
This is a really great poem. Nice job and well done(: 

on Apr. 5 2011 at 11:23 am
Hi my name is blanka fatu and this guy is really stupid and fat (colton) but stop copyin my work artard.

on Apr. 5 2011 at 11:16 am
shut up cityboy 13 ur makin fun of my comment... YES!

on Apr. 5 2011 at 9:35 am
THIS WAS A HOT POEM I REALLY LOVED THIS IT BROUGHT BACK MERRIORES THANK YOU HOPE U MAKE MORE

on Apr. 4 2011 at 5:32 pm
AWESOME POEM(: YOU GOT TALENT!!!!!!

on Apr. 4 2011 at 4:55 pm
sounds about like MY dad :p

on Apr. 3 2011 at 9:38 am
bbcly123 BRONZE, New York City, New York
1 article 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;be the change you wish to see in the world.&quot;

i really did not understand why the title said daddies womb so it made want to read it AND HONESTLY IT WAS GOOD.

on Apr. 2 2011 at 4:45 pm
X-CountryRunner BRONZE, Imperial, California
2 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Never Give Up, Never Give In&quot;

Great Poem!!

RandomPi said...
on Apr. 2 2011 at 5:05 am
This is a lovely poem. Great job!

on Apr. 1 2011 at 7:43 pm
PoeticallyCorrect BRONZE, Ellenwood, Georgia
3 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
im not lame &#039;cuz i aint cripple<br /> u dont know me like i know me<br /> i love you, no i just like you like you

i wish my writing was as beautiful as this......amazing

on Mar. 31 2011 at 6:36 pm
BananaHana GOLD, Chinook, Montana
16 articles 16 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.<br /> -Ralph Waldo Emerson-

Keep up the good work...this is a great poem!

on Mar. 31 2011 at 10:32 am
This is a very beautiful piece.<3

ronniesofly said...
on Mar. 30 2011 at 11:31 am
this poem was deep and i like it i thin this is really great!

on Mar. 29 2011 at 5:25 pm
Penfencer BRONZE, Amherst, Massachusetts
4 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;I see you have a sword. I have one too. They&#039;re very ... manly. And ... tough.&quot;<br /> -Mulan

I feel like sometimes here you're working so hard to make it rhyme that you lose some of the power. The rhyme scheme is also a little bit wavering. I love the message though, and you have some good stuff, but I would really like to see this as a free verse non-rhyming poem, because I think you could get your message across a lot better that way.

on Mar. 29 2011 at 2:54 pm
Untouchable-Summer SILVER, Cranford, New Jersey
6 articles 0 photos 86 comments

Favorite Quote:
Even the best fall down sometimes

I don't really understand this.. what does it mean?