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Daddy's Womb MAG

April 23, 2008
By Anonymous

i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.

© Anonymous

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 2185 comments.

julyox20 SILVER said...
on Oct. 13 2010 at 5:27 pm
julyox20 SILVER, Huntley, Illinois
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the first part was kind of confusing. But the second part completely makes sense.
iAmTheStardust PLATINUM said...
on Oct. 13 2010 at 2:12 pm
iAmTheStardust PLATINUM, Moon Twp., Pennsylvania
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i also agree. great words, i like the detail, i'm just not sure what you're getting at, it doesn't make much sense to me. it's not the first time i've read this poem actually, i keep coming back to it. some how it just keeps calling to me "Come back, maybe i'll make more sense to you". it just never really does... you're good at writing i'm just confused.
roar_gabbyx BRONZE said...
on Oct. 12 2010 at 3:18 pm
roar_gabbyx BRONZE, Toronto, Other
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I kind of don't get it. ???
autumn77 said...
on Oct. 12 2010 at 9:32 am
me either, i like it but i dont understand
yearsgoneby SILVER said...
on Oct. 11 2010 at 7:51 am
yearsgoneby SILVER, Montclair, New Jersey
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Wow. That was absolutely amazing. Keep writing, you are very talented. :)
Traintoclarksville BRONZE said...
on Oct. 9 2010 at 11:42 pm
Traintoclarksville BRONZE, Lake Worth, Florida
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This is truly beautiful.
squalur996 GOLD said...
on Oct. 8 2010 at 3:02 pm
squalur996 GOLD, Henderson, Nevada
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this makes me think, and i like that about it.

 

HollisWoods said...
on Oct. 6 2010 at 8:15 pm
That's an interesting topic. I wonder what your inspiration was?  Ironic, though, how the father said the ocean would trap you when it was really him all along...
BroadwayBoundOK BRONZE said...
on Oct. 5 2010 at 10:48 am
BroadwayBoundOK BRONZE, Moore, Oklahoma
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I really dont understand this. I think its good. But I just dont understand.
Chacharoo BRONZE said...
on Oct. 4 2010 at 11:55 pm
Chacharoo BRONZE, Fort Worth, Texas
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Wow, 795 (now 796) comments.

Amazing amazing free verse. I wish I had written this. Wow. That is all I'm going to say...

 

Wow.

spiritualrevelationrevealspainandrevolution PLATINUM said...
on Oct. 4 2010 at 7:36 pm
spiritualrevelationrevealspainandrevolution PLATINUM, Eugene, Oregon
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its a good poem but...., theres no way this deserves to be top voted, everybody look up champagne eyes, forget who its by but its good(not by me)
Dianeyka said...
on Oct. 4 2010 at 12:30 pm
Dianeyka, Kissimee, Florida
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this is an ah'mazing free verse : )
taahhlliiaaax3 BRONZE said...
on Oct. 1 2010 at 8:16 am
taahhlliiaaax3 BRONZE, Nahant, Massachusetts
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I love this poem, this reminds me of my & my mother.

Great job(:

Keep writing!

ebee123 SILVER said...
on Sep. 30 2010 at 5:42 pm
ebee123 SILVER, Rochester, Minnesota
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I like how "i" is not capitalized, but Father is. Good touch.
Desaree H. BRONZE said...
on Sep. 29 2010 at 8:09 am
Desaree H. BRONZE, Lakeville, Ohio
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this poem is really good and very meaningful keep writing :)
Runner4Ever said...
on Sep. 28 2010 at 9:49 am
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I agree. This poem was hard to follow. It is a great poem if it would direct us more and explain better.
Elisabeth GOLD said...
on Sep. 27 2010 at 5:01 pm
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K, so I didn't really like it, and I ama not trying to be mean or anything I really like what you had to offer, just not with this story. I liked the detial, but was confused on what was going on and who the poeple where and why the son was bound.
lily26 BRONZE said...
on Sep. 26 2010 at 10:05 am
lily26 BRONZE, St. Louis, Missouri
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You are amazing that was REALLY good
eddydooz said...
on Sep. 25 2010 at 11:43 am
Poetic justic my friend, poetic justice.
Kwana Donelson said...
on Sep. 23 2010 at 11:15 am
- i don't really understand who this is about. But i like the title and what's begin explained. I think this would be better if there was a little more explaining.